For those of you who don’t know, I am very short. Not in a creepy dwarfish kind of way, but let’s just say that if I were a guy, it would be really embarrassing to be this little. Although I often think how much easier life would be if I were just a smidgen taller, I have come to the realisation that there is absolutely nothing that I can do about it (unless I go for that weird surgery where they break your knee-caps and stretch your tendons - see Grey’s Anatomy - but for some reason that doesn’t really appeal to me). And so, I do what any sane person in my situation would do, and I wear heels.
I love high heels. The shape of them, the colour of them, the really powerful feeling that I get when I wear them... I am certain that shoe designers save all of their creative awesomeness for heels alone, because they are undoubtedly the best-looking shoes of all. Having said that, I have to admit that they are not the most comfortable things on the planet. And when I find myself in a situation where the evening has not turned out as I had hoped, and I stand there bored and with throbbing feet, I often wonder which sadist invented these beautifully painful masterpieces.
Bearing this in mind, I decided to do a little bit of research and post pictures of the most ludicrous high heels that I could find. Yes yes, they were probably created as artworks as opposed to practical shoes, but I think some of these designers have taken their creations a step too far!
And finally, the Guinness World Record for the highest heeled shoes commercially available goes to these beauties: 11 inch platforms and 16 inch heels. Ouch!